Tuesday, January 8, 2008

I'm not ready for this

I mailed off birthday party invitations today. For my son's 1st birthday party. Did I miss something? Like the past 11 months? When did this happen? I am so not prepared for this. I was excited when he started getting a few months older so he could smile and coo at us. But this crawling, standing, babbling 11 1/2 month old cannot be my child.

While we were at the doctor's office yesterday I went ahead and scheduled his 1 year checkup. I think I may have teared up a little, ok a lot, whatever. I am so excited to see everything he is doing and the little person he is becoming. I am getting a better idea of his permanent eye color and his personality. He has 4 teeth and another one popping through as I type. No one prepares you for this. They tell you that they grow up fast but until you actually experience it you don't really understand. Like the new bride that nods knowingly when people tell her marriage is hard. Like uh huh, yeah how hard can it really be people I know what I am getting into? You don't know until you have been there.

I am truly shocked at the speed at which this year has passed. This time last year I still didn't own a crib, a changing table, or anything remotely baby related. My baby shower was the day before my water broke. I didn't have a suitcase packed or clothes laid out. The baby clothes and bedding hadn't been washed. I wasn't prepared. I feel the same way about this 1st year of parenting. It has been a whirlwind and I was Dorothy dropped into Oz. I remember getting dressed to go to the hospital with my amniotic fluid dripping everywhere thinking oh my God I am going to come home with a baby. I was shaking so badly my husband had to sit me down and put my shoes on. Now it has been almost a year and I don't know where it went. It has been a trial by fire for sure but incredible all the same.

4 comments:

She Likes Purple said...

Oh I can just imagine. Happy almost birthday to him!

Constance said...

Oh, I know. You're absolutely right.

And I wasn't really ready for my first, either. I bought the carseat the day before my water broke, and I felt like I was buying it "too early."

Life In Progress said...

Oh, you are so right. No one prepares you. Or, maybe they try, but there is no way you can be prepared. It only gets worse too. I took the 1st birthday of my second baby harder than the first one.

BTW, thanks for the Destin idea. It sounds great. I never used to be a huge beach person, but my girls LOVE it, so that would probably be a great spot for us. I'm putting it on the list. Thanks!

Beth said...

If you think the first year went by quickly then wait for years 2, 3,4 and 5. I just can't believe how fast the years are going by even though there are some days that just drag and drag!