Wednesday, January 2, 2008

Back to work

The holiday is over. My blissful week and a half off work is done. The daycare people were happy to see Bear this morning though so that made me feel a little better. When I dropped him off the teacher told me one of the other teachers called her to remind her Bear would be back today because she was so excited. It has been a quiet morning so far though since everyone is just getting back.

I am glad to have the holidays behind me though. Normally I am depressed at the end of the holidays when I pack up and leave my parent's houses and then even more so when I pack up my trees and decorations. This year my heart just wasn't in it for some reason. It took me 2 hours but I got the tree all put away last night and it was such a relief to have my living room back. The house looks oddly bare but I love having the extra space back.

I had a mini meltdown last night. My husband and I were bickering about stupid things all day yesterday. So stupid, I don't even remember what they were a day later. I realize we have been doing that a lot lately and I hate that. I thought to myself, how much harder can it be for us to be nice to each other? My new resolve is to be a better wife in 2008. I have definitely been neglecting my marriage lately with the working, baby, life stuff. I also yelled at Bear last night and made him cry. In my defense, he was trying to chew on an electrical cord but still. I felt awful. So I went to bed and cried and cried about what a crappy wife, mother, employee I have been lately. Then I cuddled up to my husband and apologized for all the mean things I had said and told him what a great husband he really was. I went and checked on Bear and sat in his room in the dark for awhile and stroked his little soft fluffy head through the crib bars. I am extremely blessed and I tend to forget that when things get stressful.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Everybody has those days. I hope you feel better soon.